The Players



"Smilin'" Joe Cucci
Joe dere is the one who came up with the idea for this here team. He is one of the sweepers. He uses a really nice broom which he got oot at K-Mart. He is the league's curling expert, you betcha. He enjoys eating back bacon sandwiches and drinking Molson's. He also has the finest tuque collection south of Canada. You can visit his hip page at Hey Dummies.

Willy Perkins
William "Willy" Perkins was the third member to join the league. He is the skip. His broom is one of the newest on the line, the "Super Sweeper 2001." He is the league's treasurer and at times dresses up as the club's mascot. When he's not curling, you can find him back in his home town of Sylacauga, Alabama where he eats fatback and grits and drinks red and whites (Budwiser).

Jon Essenburg
Male
15
Politically, Fashionably and Aerodynamically Incorrect.

Kelly
Kelly is the first woman brave enough to join the testosterone filled ranks of the ECL. She quickly became the toughest in the group. When she gets out her broom, which looks like a mace with bristles, you know the game is about to get bloody. You don't want to make her mad when she has the curling stone either. She throws that thing like she's a major league baseball player. Even big Jon has been found crying in the corner after a game against Kelly.

Taylor
Look out, Kelly, there's a new curling gal in the league. Taylor recently beat out hundreds of potential team members at our tryouts in beautiful Ona. She's on her way to becoming one of the finest curlers thanks to her incredible strength (of course it's still no match for Kelly's Herculean toughness). She doesn't just knock out the opponents' stones, she destroys them with her awesome might. With her help, we will continue to be the best team in all of Englewood and possibly come home with a trophy from the next bonspiel.

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